An obese man from New York City has snuck past security and air crash investigators to eat the moored aircraft involved in yesterday’s Hudson River water landing.
Following the removal of Burger King’s Facebook application – which offered users a free Whopper for every 10 friends they deleted – Fred I Hungwee found that his insatiable hunger for a free meal had returned, so he decided to make his way to Battery Park City and masquerade as an NTSB official.
This enabled him to infiltrate the heavy security around the Airbus A320, and enter the cabin, where he began to eat the fuselage from the inside.
Security guards were alerted to Hungwee’s presence when they heard munching sounds, and the words: “Mmmm… I love the taste of leather seating!”
They searched the cabin, and eventually discovered a bloated Hungwee with a aircraft toilet seat in his mouth. “He must have huge lungs – and a huge stomach – because we estimate that he was underwater in the cabin for about half an hour,” said Don Buffman, a security guard.
Hungwee was taken to hospital, where doctors were astounded by his ability to digest leather, plastic and metal. He is expected to make a full recovery, but has been ordered by a judge to attend ‘Hunger Management’ classes as part of his sentence.