In an interesting turn of events, North Korean leader Kim Jong-il has bought Barack Obama’s former seat in the Illinois Senate. The seller was unknown, but sources say his name started with an ‘R’, and ended with ‘od Blagojevich’. We were unable to decode the source’s clue.
When we interviewed Mr. Il, he said: “I am very pleased with opportunity to take your stupid country down. I take you down, and I make you bow down before me. Should be fun.”
Mr. Il, affectionately known as ‘Kimmy’, is expected to have a major influence in the Illinois Senate, perhaps converting Chicago’s Adler Planetarium into a missile silo.
Mr. Obama was surprised by the news, and said that he was looking forward to co-operating with Mr. Il, but wouldn’t allow him greater strength. He assured Americans that they would be safe from his dictator tendencies.
Mr. Il is scheduled to address the Illinois public tonight, from the roof of Sears Tower.
*Please note that this report is satirical, and should not be taken as truth, unless you want it to be… Thankyou for reading this ridiculously small text!